8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Randomize
