Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
