even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Its about making memories worth repressing
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
