Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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