respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
