Non-Jews are for practice
I feel like abortions should bother me more
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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