Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
