Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
We have started to decorate penises.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
