K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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