butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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