I am puke
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
