come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
