whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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