this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
