I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
