youre lurking in front of me
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Randomize
