I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
