What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I love you.
Bad choice
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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