I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
