yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Randomize
