he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
