She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Randomize
