Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
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