Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize