I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Just invented taco cereal.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
