I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
