just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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