Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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