Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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