we have officially lost it.
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
of course. lets lasso hookers.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
