no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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