I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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