He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
