Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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