My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Randomize
