she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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