how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
