Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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