I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
