is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
