hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
found the other keg... it's in the tree
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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