I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
The feeling are messing with the penis
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize