There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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