I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
