I'd wear matching sweaters with you
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
