I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
