i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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