at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
