I could make wine with my vomit
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
