Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
